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The Dinner Game. Charlotte Gainsbourg. It seems sexist to me and I think it contradicts gender equality issues. I am married and I only have my wedding ring, as does my husband. I am a mixture in this whole debate, an American living in London for the past 8 years married two months ago to my English husband after 7 years of dating! There is definitely a culture in America of bigger, showier rings, how big is the ring etc.
I might even say that I probably fell into that trap in my younger years of thinking that is what I needed it is what most of my friends, family, and others wanted for me too. I moved to London to be with my then boyfriend, no ring, but it felt like something I was doing for me and for us to see where it could go. I certainly wanted it to go somewhere but I had to take some risk to find out. I also wanted to experience living in another culture which I think has given me a different perspective so it was an easy decision to make.
Sadly, she passed away before we were married but it is nice to know that she knew we were engaged. To me, marriage should be about two people coming together, committing to spend their lives together. Sadly I think sometimes it is. Since I have been married 2 months I feel differently from the 7 years we have lived together, in a really nice, comforting and loving way and that is what is important for me. I am so with you! So interesting.
There is such pressure here in America to propose and be proposed to! I was living in NYC when I got engaged to a man living in the midwest.
Did you get it?
It was very intimate and special and made very charming by his nerves and the element of suprise for us both. It is important for most of the girls the place, the ring, the everything, but I hate it when people just do it in order to take a picture and uploaded it on facebook or their blog. Come on, it is your personal moment with the love of your live, you do not have to smile and take a picture right after you said yes and he like it and put a ring on it :D. Then one summer night we both looked at each other and we knew the time was right!
We wanted it to be really private and we wanted it to be just us, so a few months later we arranged to elope to a beautiful island and got married there. But at the end I have sadly witnessed so many couples breaking up, ending in divorce, even after the gigantic ring and a big elaborate wedding…. I also feel sorry for the guy that have to save up for the ring until he can finally propose and the girl complaining about, when is he going to propose already. I think if it makes you happy, then go for it, but I think we can agree that the big diamond really have to do with commercialism, just like so many things in this country.
Just look at the movie Blood Diamond…. As my engagement ring was being set with a beautiful old mine-cut but I prefer princess diamond my fiancee had to fly to Toronto for business. What to do?
Pick up the diamond from the jeweler, fly off to Toronto myself to hand it to my fiancee……. Thought it was romantic at the time. My husband and I had been engaged one…or two times before we finally decided to tie the knot. I think the difference this time, for me, was that we finally threw all social convention out the window. My husband and I are not only lucky that we found each other but that we live in a state where we are able to be married…. I wear the watch everyday with any outfit and it is as much part of me as my simple gold wedding band.
He knew well enough that diamonds were not my thing. My husband proposed with a ring I chose after searching online. It has a blue topaz as a center stone. The ring is beautiful and the color of the topaz is my favorite shade. Plus, having a topaz as a center stone took all the focus off of the price of the ring and back onto our romance. This is fascinating.
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Only because at a deeper level it has to do with socio-economics and how American culture is consumed with materialism. I understand wanting to feel like your union is special, it is! The union is totally sacred and should totally be celebrated! The focus should be on the relationship and how to grow together into people you actually like. Et connais-tu Paris vs NYC? Nicole, This is so romantic! Your husband really knows you.
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Sadly divorce rates are so high….. I agree…. I was born and raised in East Africa, growing up, I lived in 3 different countries, studied abroad in France and Belgium and have been in the US for the last 15 years.
I have to say that at first the whole marriage and divorce thing was a culture shock to begin with, then I learned how much people spend on engagement rings and weddings, then I was really shocked. Who cares? Then after the engagement ring, people obsess over wedding bands!! And what happened to people just rolling over from a great dinner and decide to get married?
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